My spirit does have a say. A lot of times it is just quiet & shy and doesn’t speak up unless I address it and ask it directly for advice, for instance. Just because it is quiet, it doesn’t mean it doesn’t see what is going on.
It records everything.
It actually has “needs”, too. I can deny it, big time, with my powerful will and self-discipline & determination to do what mostly, I think I should do. I want whatever out of life I can get and I’m willing to do anything (haven’t walked on coals yet!) to get it. Of course, I have a lot of denial in all of this “pursuit” of perfectionism. But my spirit is a key player. It wants its share of game time. Sitting on the sidelines doesn’t get it. It certainly doesn’t want to be relegated to the bench. It’s a star player, after all. It knows what will make the rest of “me” happy, fulfilled.
But the rest of me often has to wade through a lot of fear to give it a voice & some weight in my life.
After a long stint of self-discipline, say not one speck, drop of sugar–to the extent that that’s possible, a psychic saw this in me (I didn’t say a word to her about it) and said I should go out and eat all the sugar I wanted, that I could find–just to balance the scales. So I did…
Nowadays, I have to weigh some treats, deviations from the “protocol” that my body seems to function best on, for some FUN. Some ENJOYMENT even if overall healthy quotient may take a backseat temporarily.
My spirit basically comes out of the closet, unwilling to be ignored & remain silent anymore, and says: “You OWE me!” (in a loud, [rather loud] voice). Hmm O.K. Oh! I didn’t realize you were being so overlooked, or if I did, I was ignoring that (thought), too.
So without capsizing the whole effort here, I’m endeavoring to make time if I have to, for my spirits’ fun frivolities and take risks on its’ behalf.
Photograph © Dennis Frates Photography http://www.fratesphoto.com/
Moraine Lake with fog. Banff National Park, Canada