growth

“Forward” Progress

I walk , facing forward, yet I’m not

always sure, I’m going forward.

Am I getting better & better?

2 steps forward to every one back?

Or is it the other way around,

seeming to proceed ahead

yet sliding into a previous learning

that I had thought I had gone past?

It’s good to take time, to

stop & reflect, where I am

& where I think I’m going

or even where I’ve been.  Was it

my “choice”, or did I end up in

a situation not easily backed out

of I would’ve never chosen in

the first place?

Life is never even close to being

certain.  When you choose, the

dice are on the way.  Where they

stop is sort of out of your hands

so to speak & you let the wind

or the vibration of the surround-

ings determine how far they

roll before coming to a stop.

You go in one direction away

from where you’ve been

and expect a different,

more favorable, possibly,

experience.

But forward you must go,

never the less.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Faith

People help me when I need help.

Of course, it’s helpful to ask for it.

Not everyone will know you need

help.

Not to chase after it

but if you need something

like this writing

to calm down

then do it

and let the unsure,

scary feelings pass

out of you.

They will go.

Just because there’s a little

pressure that is new

is not a reason to

cash in all your chips

and go home.

Keep going in the

direction you’re going in.

There’s no reason to

give up making

‘conscious’ forward

progress.

 

Categories: creative writing, faith, fear, growth, learning, now, possibilities, stop, Uncategorized, walking, writing | Leave a comment

Letting Go

What’s it like to let go?

Completely?  Would you just

wander around in a daze?

Not knowing (ever!) what to do

next?

Maybe for ‘practice’ for a while,

but for everyday life?

Where would it lead you to

just follow your nose,

pick up the scent of the unknown?

Maybe for the brave & adventurous.

Maybe for me.  I’m brave &

adventurous mostly, I’d say…

Let go.

Relax.

See what all that activity you’re

feverishly whisking past your

consciousness is keeping you

from seeing, avoiding

feeling something you know

is there (we all have those) but you’re

‘afraid’ to leave time for it to

rise into awareness & be felt,

whatever it is.

Letting go from one trapeze bar

to the next requires…? are you

up for it?

 

Categories: awareness, busyness, courage, creative, creative writing, fear, growth, Poetry, possibilities, risk, spontaneous, surprise, Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Chaos Reigns

Today was a day like no other.

I couldn’t have anticipated all

that went on around me.

My wits were tested.  I’ve fallen

before, where I didn’t this time.

I’m learning to control my

extreme reactions

under pressure, whereas

before I would have not had

such patience.

I  modulated my responses when

previously I would have ended up

losing it, and blasting some

little kid out of his seat for maybe

good reason, but still not worth a

blast.  I’m surprising myself

at confronting these difficult

situations.  It feels good!

I passed many tests–and I was the

teacher!

Off the battlefield a little wiser

maybe, to try to be even more

effective the next time, and with

greater fulfillment.

 

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!! 100 Birthdays !!

My friend invited me to

his mom’s 100th birthday

party!!  Relatives-very

elderly relatives

themselves–came

thousands of miles

to be in his mom’s

backyard this afternoon.

I felt so honored to be

welcomed into their

presence.

I met the most interesting

people!  I was willing to

take risks, and, as always,

was rewarded.

I’m ready, as much as I’m

capable, and at a step at a

time, to rearrange my life

to reflect my new awareness,

it seems, that is dawning or

beginning to dawn on

me.  I want to be

braver, living my

life without later regrets.

Some way, I will

be able to change

my tack, heading

off in a new direction.

I’m glad I went.

Very rich experience.

 

Categories: best buddies, courage, creative, creative writing, fear, fresh air, friends, fun, growth, happiness, love, nature, outside, people, Poetry, possibilities, risk, shy, surprise, Uncategorized, writing | Tags: | Leave a comment

Trusting

The universe, the all-that-is, is guiding my

footsteps.  It says wait, a good job will come

up.  Really?  I’m supposed to wait on you

for a life?  For a direction?  Alright.  Not much

I can do anyway at the end of the night before

bedtime.  You’ve got it, universe.  It’s in your

hands.  My faith is wavering–it’s like practicing

your best pitches left-handed when you’re

right-handed.  But my faith is underused if

even existent, as far as comforting me that

things will work out in my favor and I

need not worry!  Yeah, right.  But I let it go.

My fears, like a pack of yapping dogs

needn’t have been given any attention by me

today or any day.  Nothing comes up

disastrous as sometimes poor experiences in

the past, stick to you so tightly, you begin

to think you’re doomed to repeat your

‘bad luck’ in attracting them.  They’re

really there for your benefit.  You’re so glad you

had them when they’re through agonizing you.

But unlike the head banging on the wall feels

so good when you stop, these were ‘necessary’

or at least seemingly so.  Once you let loose of

the emotional charge connected with them, you’re

free to see & live from their beneficial side in

your life.  The universe brought them to you.  Never

in a million years would you willingly walk into

such a den of lions and say eat me, I’m fresh

meat, defenseless from inexperience in dealing

with lions so have at me.  Eat your or my

heart out.  But the universe knows when you need

such a lesson & will drop one in your lap, willingly.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Categories: abundance, courage, creative, creative writing, faith, fear, fun, growth, love, people, Poetry, possibilities, risk, sleep, Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Green & Blue

 

Green said to blue,

are you up for something new?

Sure green.  What do you have in mind?

I don’t have to do any more than

saturate the page with green –like

a forest.  Just being.  Not needing to

go anywhere, for a forest just is

until it’s no longer.  Green

all the way.

You can be the sky and I’ll be

the trees.  We’ll make a good

team.  You can even be the

water,  I’ll just keep growing

greener everyday.

We need to stay strong and

not lose our color–even a little

bit.  So let’s clean up our acts

and get to work.  A nice

picture will we make–

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Feel

Why go on?

The way I am?

What for?

It can be so

unsatisfying.

When I think

of all I’m

shutting out

by choosing

to choose

the same old

same old

humdrum

of my life.

I feel cowardly

doing that.

Playing it safe

nauseates me.

I don’t know

where to head

but anywhere

else is probably

a good start.

How do I

find the courage

to walk out

on my own,

trusting in

my worth

to provide

for me

as the “old”

way did?

I know I need to

soul search

and how is that

going?

Very slow to

Nada.

My soul feels

empty of any

confidence

I might gather

to strip to

the bone

all away

that covers

my, as yet

undiscovered

dreams

Close up of Foxglove flowers.

that are only a

few steps away

toward engaging

with that path.

I hope something

comes along to

jet stream

me to a more

satisfying, less

stuck, path.

All I can do

is be open

and willing,

I guess,

to embrace

my fears.

Photography © Dennis Frates Photography  http://www.fratesphoto.com/

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Categories: awareness, courage, creative, creative writing, growth, openness, Poetry, risk, time, Uncategorized, visibility | Leave a comment

Walk into Fear

Not to walk in to the fires of fear

is a sure death sentence for the

soul, and the life of the being.

The fear will not leave until you

face it.  And then it may only lessen.

Repeat lessons are usually in order

and you get better with practice.

That’s the way for most of us.  Non-

Mozarts.  It always seems to be going

nowhere to us and the progress we

expect.  But down the road, a meeting

with a friend you haven’t see in a while

highlights your here-to-fore unawareness

of how beautifully you’ve changed.

It’s good to go for what you want.  Not let

outside forces affect your steps.  Or your

mind cajoleing you in wayward directions.

You may get singed.  Most steps going

anywhere can’t avoid it.  Your thin skin will

become thicker and you won’t be thrown

off so easily anymore.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Categories: awareness, courage, creative, creative writing, fear, friends, growth, learning, Poetry, risk, Uncategorized | Tags: , | Leave a comment

On the Road

Once the outer rim of reality

is breached

you wonder where you were

your perception jaded

lashed by feelings

run amok

your body contained.

Brain fog doesn’t

announce itself.

When you’re in brain fog,

you don’t know

you’re in brain fog.

Only after,

it’s clear.

Still, a path

is traveled

to freedom.

An island of

peace that says

you earned it

from your travels

along the way.

Everything’s ok out

there.  You just have

to see it that way

and give up your

cockeyed outlook on

how you think it’s

all going to come

down.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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